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Sunday, 11 February 2024 04:48

I was miserable in my 30s. Then I turned 50, and I’ve never been happier—here’s the No. 1 reason why

What if the secret to being happier was purely just to get older? It sounds absurd, but at 63 years old, I can say that the last few decades have been a tale of two midlives: one very dark from my 30s- to -40s, and one truly splendid ... starting when I hit 50. The No. 1 reason? My emotional intelligence increased. And, as I discovered while writing my book, “Learning to Love Midlife: 12 Reasons Why Life Gets Better with Age,” high emotional intelligence is a crucial ingredient for boosting happiness and resilience. Emotional intelligence, which is the capacity…

Friday, 09 February 2024 04:24

The No. 1 mistake people make when trying to win arguments

You might assume winning arguments — over politics, a work project, or even where to eat — requires hours of researching data and rehearsing well-informed points. Not necessarily, says Jonah Berger, a marketing professor at the University of Pennsylvania’s Wharton School. Most people think changing minds requires “some version of pushing” with “more facts, more figures [and] more emotional appeals,” but that method usually fails, he says. “We spend a lot of time thinking, ‘If the client didn’t bite, my colleague didn’t listen, or my spouse didn’t hear me, let me tell them one more time,’” he tells CNBC Make…

Tuesday, 06 February 2024 04:45

This trait is a subtle sign someone is highly intelligent, says psychotherapist

Sometimes, the signs that someone is smart are easily recognizable. Other giveaways are more subtle. The top one: being a good listener, says New York-based psychotherapist and career coach Jenny Maenpaa. People who “are able to perceive an interaction holistically, rather than just being in the moment and responding to the last thing you said with the first thing they thought of” are usually highly intelligent, Maenpaa tells CNBC Make It. This skill is also known as active listening, and it requires more than just sitting in silence while someone speaks. “Active listening is when someone can listen to you…

Saturday, 03 February 2024 04:42

I walked 20K steps a day for over 2 years and learnt 5 lessons

It all began for me with a one-year public commitment to walk 20,000 steps a day, and to share my step count, a daily photo, and my insights on Facebook and Instagram. I had been on a fitness journey for 10 years. I started as a runner. I eventually realized I enjoyed walking so much more so I made the decision to stop running and walk even more. Five years later, I wanted to encourage and motivate others to do the same, so I started a blog and kicked it off with that splashy, public commitment to walk 20,000 steps…

Thursday, 01 February 2024 04:45

11 things you can do in 10 minutes or less today to increase your executive presence tomorrow

Having a strong executive presence is the difference between making an impact and feeling like you're just going through the motions. Good work and good intentions alone won't propel your career forward. To make things happen, you need to master your own emotions, have a clear and compelling point of view, and be able to bring others along. "She was born with it" is a common misbelief. In fact, the opposite is true. Executive presence is a collection of skills that can be learned and improved. Executive presence is all about your ability to project confidence, establish credibility, and inspire…

Wednesday, 24 January 2024 04:43

‘Work needs rest and rest takes work’: fatigue specialist Vincent Deary on coping with life

Vincent Deary, psychologist, fatigue specialist and author, has been telling me what an “anxious creature” he is. He barely slept last night. The hotel room was unfamiliar and noisy. Worse, the prospect of an interview and of meeting someone new made his arrhythmic heart race. It’s racing now as we sit together in a London hotel. We’re here to discuss his new book, How We Break: Navigating the Wear and Tear of Living, an exploration of our varying responses to the corrosive pressures of daily life, especially work, and an assertion of the vital necessity of rest, recovery and the…

Sunday, 21 January 2024 04:37

14 things the younger generations of men do today that older generations of men can't wrap their head around

We asked older men of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us what things younger men do that confuse them. Here's what leaves them bewildered the most: 1. "I don't get that seemingly every teenage guy has the exact same haircut now, and it bugs the crap out of me. Big and poufy up top, with permanent hat hair because the tips swoop up at the bottom. They all look like they're wearing helmets and haven't showered in weeks. I just want to pull them aside and ask if girls actually like that, because you don't see a single man over…

Saturday, 20 January 2024 04:52

68-year-old who ‘unretired’: I went on a 30-day silent retreat—what I learned about how to live a happy, regret-free life

At the end of 2015, I felt stuck. After a near-death experience, I had to quit my job and retire early to prioritize my health. My health improved, but the rest of my life did not. I felt bored and purposeless in retirement, and my relationships suffered. I started to wonder, “Is this all there is?” In search of answers, I signed up for a 30-day silent retreat in St. Beuno’s, a former Jesuit seminary in North Wales that’s now a spiritual retreat center. At first, spending 30 days in silence was harder than I thought. But I was eventually…

Tuesday, 16 January 2024 04:47

Despite warnings from Police, Nigerians still ‘no gree for anybody’

A Nigerian slang that gained popularity in the New Year, signifying resilience against oppression, has sparked controversy after police cautioned that the slogan might carry a message of rebellion. Though not entirely new, the pidgin English phrase “No gree for anybody” has gone viral as a rallying cry for self-reliance and toughness in the face of adversities since the year began. With Nigeria grappling with economic challenges and security threats ranging from Boko Haram activities to kidnapping, the phrase has become a collective mantra for navigating the challenges of 2024. Last week, the Force Public Relations Officer, Olumuyiwa Adejobi, issued…

Sunday, 14 January 2024 04:41

This man kicked his stepdaughter out of a restaurant during dinner, and people say he’s right

Recently, a post by since-removed Reddit user u/Fearless_Studio_7676 (or Fearless Studio, for short) got a lot of attention on the popular "Am I The Asshole?" subreddit. Fearless Studio shared his story and asked, "Am I the asshole for making my stepdaughter leave the restaurant for disrespecting the waiter?" Here's what happened, in Fearless Studios' own words. "I was dining with my wife and kids yesterday," he begins. "[Our party] included Hailey, 16, who's my stepdaughter. We had picked a relatively expensive restaurant as we thought it'd be better to do things properly as we were going out together for the…

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Sunday, 07 January 2024 04:27

21 facts about life in the '80s that’ll seriously surprise young people

Recently, we shared a post about things from life in the '80s that would surprise or maybe even blow the minds of young people (like that teachers/admin could paddle badly-behaving students legally in most places). Well, members of the BuzzFeed Community chimed in with more terrific examples of things from the '80s young people likely have no idea about, and reading them was like a trip to the past for a Gen X'er like me. Check them out: 1. "There was no caller ID, so calling people you didn't like (like teachers) or even just complete randos to make some…

Saturday, 06 January 2024 05:00

The most likable people always avoid these 13 communication mistakes, say speech and words experts

Words matter. How you choose them and how you use them makes a big difference in the way people perceive you. Researchers have found that there are certain words, phrases and other ways of communicating that can make others think more highly of you, improve your reputation, and help create a more empathetic and compassionate workplace. Here are 13 communication mistakes that the most likable people always avoid: 1. Not greeting people What to do: Say “Hello,” “Good morning,” or ask “How are you?” Greeting people, even in a casual way, pays off big time. Nowadays, many people feel that…

Friday, 05 January 2024 04:45

Reclaim your brain: Why it's time to stop scrolling our lives away

A few months ago, we asked our readers a simple question: are you happy with how much time you’re spending on your phone? We received hundreds of responses, and they made one thing clear: many of us are deeply unhappy with how much time we spend on our phones, but find it hard to pull away. “I’m unhappy, I feel addicted. My ability to concentrate seems to have vanished.” “I can’t just sit and ‘be’ any more. I automatically reach for my phone if there is a moment of downtime. My brain struggles to settle and focus for any period…

Monday, 01 January 2024 04:38

How smartphones wrecked bar drinking

Clare Coffey Gone are the days when stopping by a certain kind of bar pretty much guaranteed some human contact. These days, bars can feel like the loneliest places on the planet. When the first wave of lockdown regulations ended, back in 2020, I can still remember what I was most excited for. Going to bars again. Perhaps, during a moment of such gravity, this excitement may seem trivial, or even louche. But I love bars, and always have. I love the opportunities (increasingly rare) that they present for just quietly sitting and thinking, for luxuriating in a small pleasure.…

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