And look that thou make them after their pattern, which was shewed thee in the mount ~ Exodus 25:40.
Introduction
God intends that Christian homes should be a foretaste of heaven on earth. However, for many families these days, this ideal has become like a mirage, or like a distant echo that has lost resonance.
This sad scenario is as a result of the grievous disconnect from God's original plan and norm for the home, which is commonplace in many human communities today. Indeed, many people are toiling and struggling in vain as a direct consequence of this blatant disregard for divine order in respect to marriages and homes.
God is a God of order. He abhors disorderliness and confusion, but dwells, operates and manifests His glory in places of order. God commands His blessings and releases His goodness only in places where His order is embraced and respected. Hence, any home where disorderliness holds sway must be devoid of God's presence, and consequently, bereft of His glory and blessings.
Moses was commanded to build the Tabernacle according to a particular pattern that God showed him on the mountain, and God waited patiently until he did it properly and in accordance with His heavenly pattern. Thereafter, God came down to inhabit it and fill the tabernacle with His glory (Exodus 25:40, 40:1-34).
Someone may ask: “why do we nowadays have the problems in marriage that were not there in the olden days”? I venture to say that most of the marriage-related problems that we're presently grappling with in our world today are traceable to our modern-day “gender equality” advocacy, which subtly but steadily contradicts God's order for marriage.
Now, no matter the opinion, position, stance or reaction of the world to God’s order for family, God’s Word still stands forever!
God’s Order for Love, Submission and Responsibility in the Homes
Husbands are divinely ordered to love, admire and appreciate their wives passionately, even as Christ loved the Church and died for her. Wives are also commanded to submit to their own husbands in everything, as unto the Lord (Colossians 3:18-25). Moreover, godly children are instructed to obey their parents and submit to the authority of Christ in the homes.
Very importantly, according to God’s prerogative, the husband is instituted as the head of the family/home unit (Ephesians 5:22-25). In other words, the husband is God-ordained and set on earth as the head of the governing authority in the home.
Now, we are not at liberty to disregard, edit or dance around this heavenly ordinance, unless we’re ready for the consequences: “Whosoever therefore resisteth the power, resisteth the ordinance of God: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation” (Romans 13:2).
When godly, effective and responsible men take their rightful positions as the heads of their families, God’s glory and blessing will fill the homes and even overflow to our streets, cities and nations.
On the flip-side, any family where the husband, who is divinely equipped and strategically positioned to be the head in the family, is relegated or his authority usurped by the wife, the devil takes over and establishes his dark rule. Consequently, there'll be constant chaos, and God’s purposes may be hindered, delayed or frustrated in such families.
Flowing from this, it is critically important for every husband who has been displaced as the head in homes to arise and be restored as the head according to God’s divine order and pattern for family. Harmony occurs only where godly men are allowed by godly women to take their rightful positions as heads of the marital unions.
Truly, many wives never set out deliberately to usurp the authority of their husbands, but for the ignorance, failure or inefficiency of their husbands. It is the “absent fathers” and “visiting husbands” who inevitably sell their authorities on the platter of irresponsibility.
In fact, the consequences of the husband’s failure, inefficiency or irresponsibility as the head of the family are very enormous and far deeper than can be easily described in any human language. For instance, the fall of Adam in Eden was as a result of his failure or inefficiency as the head of his family. But, the consequences are still being felt by the entire human race today.
If it was Adam, with his original dominion, who confronted the devil when he came around to tempt them in the Garden of Eden, the story might have ended differently. But, he was “absent” from his home at that time, without any boundaries set for his wife. Eve was deceived and she fell into the satanic bait (1 Timothy 2:14).
Husbands must wake up to their God-given responsibilities or obligations as the heads of the human families. Albeit, the husband’s position as the head of his family, doesn’t suggest that he should now transform himself to a big boss, becoming a taskmaster at home, supercilious and domineering, ordering everybody around and bullying them at will.
For special emphasis, the man's responsibility in his home is to truly love and care for his wife, children and other members of the household. By the same class of order, the woman's call is to submit. When a couple does these appropriately, their home will become a foretaste of heaven on earth.
Very painfully, however, some partners in marital union rather unknowingly act as accessories to the untimely death of their spouses. How? Through constant nagging, criticisms and other such other unwholesome attitudes.
In an interesting article "How You Kill Your Spouse and Get Away With It" (author unknown), it is stated that the disorderly acts of nagging generates stress, hypertension, stroke and premature death.
It’s my well-considered opinion that even if a murderer gets away with his vice in the eye of the law on earth, God will still remember that he/she is a murderer, and will serve him/her a just dessert, sooner or later.
As a parting shot, let's briefly analyze the features that are contained in the physiology of the human head, and see how they can assist our understanding of the marital relationships.
As the “head” of his own family, the husband is configured with the “eye” of the family, to provide vision and direction. He’s also equipped with the “ear” to gather information for the body and to provide equilibrium, and the “mouth” for communication.
Furthermore, he has the “nose” to breathe, smell and discern the environment. And, he houses the “brain” for imagination, coordination and recollection. Certainly, the failure of the head will result in confusion, disorientation and even paralysis of the whole body.
Going forward, we can see what the awesome responsibility the man has under God, so, he needs the cooperation of his wife to carry them out successfully. Thus, the wife is crafted as a “suitable help” for her husband, and she should willingly yield to him as it’s fitting in the Lord, gladly inclining herself to submission to the glory of God and in the general interest of her home.
Dear friends and brethren, are you a responsible and loving husband? Are you a submissive wife in your home? The blessing of enthroning divine order in the home cannot be contemned or overlooked. In a well-ordered home, there will be great peace, glorification, edification, protection, abundant provision and promotion for all.
As we all receive the divine grace needed to flow freely with God’s order in our homes, arising in strength to fulfill our roles in our various families, may ceaseless blessings begin to flow all around us and abound in our societies. You won’t miss this, in Jesus’ Name. Amen. Happy Sunday!
** Bishop Taiwo Akinola,
Rhema Christian Church,
Otta, Ogun State, Nigeria.
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