After a late meal of fried breadfruit and a prehistoric variant of mountain legumes still very popular in the hilly intersections of Oke Osun and Ekiti terrain, your columnist was rudely awaken by the din of early morning merriment and festivity going on in the neighbourhood. Rather than rush out of bed to engage the revellers, yours sincerely decided to let discretion be the better part of valour. These days, one is never sure whether the coming revolution will be musicalized or televised.
But as the melodious noise grew louder, yours sincerely could pick Oke Ogun music and the mellifluous infusions of Ade Gator, the ancient native crooner from Oke Ogun and the dandified ululations of Ahuja Bello, the old Oke Ogun master juju musician whose brilliant career was cruelly terminated by a motor accident.
As soon as one roused to open the shutter, the reason for the din became clearer. It was Baba Lekki with a pile of newspapers on his head and screaming at the top of his voice: “Ariwo lenu Vendor!!!” Okon, the crazy one, was helping out with crowd control. Snooper could pick the scent of caustic burlesque. It was the old man’s eccentric way of welcoming the new Chief Justice Ariwoola whose appointment had been met with sly querulousness in certain quarters. Then trouble stirred as yanga woke it from slumber.
“Ah, the jurisprudence of the living oracle himself”, one man hailed from the crowd.
“Ah, it is the oracle of living jurisprudence. You see, I warned that yeye man when he was removing the Calabar boy that to probe the innards of a rodent in its burrow, you must put up your own innards for stringent examination”, the great contrarian crooned.
“But you cannot approbate and reprobate at the same time. Your man has been accused of starting primary school at the age of one, abi no be so?” the man cut in.
“Ah you see. Let them bring it on. We know of a former chief justice who never went to school at all. But, Ogbologbo, why are you not in court?” the old man demanded from his interlocutor.
“You see when the entire society is criminalized everywhere becomes a law court”, the fellow shot back and began walking away in solemn sorrow.
“Ah o ri yen so o, Baba Lekki crowed.
“But baba, why dem no remove dem Tanko man before? Dem say him head no correct again.” Okon exploded.
“Okon dem no fit. Dem no want dem mad Ibo woman called Mary come dabaru things for dem”, Baba sniggered.
At this point a squat unruly fellow muscled his way through the crowd. “Ibo man no fit be president. Ibo woman no fit be CJ and Ibo man no fit be nothing, abi? We go show you for this country”, he thundered as he shot into the crowd. Everybody dispersed.
The Nation