You see it all the time in business: people who are vocal about their achievements, who assert their opinions, and who have a certain swagger. The person may be a boss, a coworker, or an employee.
But how can you tell if the person’s behaviors come from a place of confidence or cockiness? What’s the difference? And why does it matter?
The whole key to a cocky person’s persona is that they exude confidence that masks inadequacy. Cocky people don’t have the ability to perform at the level required, so they have to make themselves look good through arrogant, boastful behaviors and impressive appearances.
So if the surface covers up shortcomings, how does the work get done? Cocky people are masters at passing a task off to someone else and taking credit for its completion.
As the boss, you have to spend energy to unravel this dynamic. That takes time away from other jobs that are meaningful on your plate.
There are certain telltale signs to determine if the person you’re dealing with is cocky or confident.
Sign #1: Talk versus action
Not to sound cliché, but a primary attribute of a cocky person is talking the talk without walking the walk. In other words, the person talks a good game but doesn’t back it up with action.
A confident person may boast about their accomplishments, but with good reason. They have the capabilities to get the job done.
Sign #2: Appearances versus reality
A cocky person looks for attention by calling attention to appearances, especially material possessions. The person may drive a fancy car or wear an expensive watch but is actually up to their eyeballs in debt.
A confident person’s reality matches or exceeds outside appearances. What you see is what you get.
Sign #3: Enforcing versus listening
A person who is cocky tends to try to impose their will, flaunting what they believe to be a position of power to get what they want. When questioned, the cocky person may respond with a variation of “Because I said so.”
By contrast, a confident person doesn’t insist on one way of doing things. Confident individuals have no need to humiliate others. They sit back, they ask questions, they listen, and they try to understand.
Sign #4: “You” versus “we”
When it comes to taking responsibility, you’re never going to hear “we” or “I” out of a cocky person. The cocky person always deflects blame to “you.” “You didn’t do what I asked.” “You made a mistake.”
Confident people look inside first and accept responsibility for themselves and their team. ”Maybe we should have done something differently.” “How can we make this better?”
Understand the risks of cockiness in business
Cocky people pose a danger to your business. They blame and deflect. They believe they can talk their way out of any situation rather than making the effort to understand. They’re more concerned with protecting their own best interest than figuring out what went wrong and solving problems.
Customers get turned off when rudely challenged. And because the external bravado is a mask for inaction and deflection, an overly cocky person tends to create additional problems by making poor decisions.
Confident people are cordial, which helps customers relax. This approach diffuses conflicts by changing the tone of the conversation. Customers appreciate a businessperson who listens and accepts responsibility.
When dealing with customers or coworkers, confident people favor a team approach, working together instead of in opposition. Confident people pose thoughtful, challenging questions. The underlying goal is to uncover what is in the best interest of the project or the customer.
Eliminating cockiness from the workplace
I try to weed out cocky people in the hiring process. I have been known to ask increasingly challenging questions in interviews to try to strip away the top layer of arrogance. It usually becomes evident pretty quickly when someone is using bravado to cover for lack of knowledge.
Even after I’ve hired someone, I’m a big advocate of challenging people to help them improve. I set high expectations and encourage my employees to reach that level. A cocky employee won’t be able to meet those challenges, a trait that reveals itself as soon as I pay closer attention to how work is getting done.
For example, I will closely examine specific indicators of the person’s performance, such as sales quotas, to see if and how the person is meeting these expectations. Also, I carefully observe interactions with customers.
I might pop into a customer meeting unannounced to watch what’s going on. If the customer is raising concerns, and my employee is talking around those concerns rather than taking responsibility and addressing them directly, that’s a red flag for me.
Eventually, a cocky employee’s shortcomings take their toll on customers and coworkers. If you’re the boss, your integrity is on the line.
Evaluate your own behavior
As you go about your business, evaluate yourself and the people who work for you. How do you conduct yourself in meetings? How do you behave with your employees and coworkers?
What type of businessperson would you like to be? Because if you fall on the cocky side of the spectrum, you’re just holding yourself back.
Cockiness is self-serving. A cocky person continues to boost themselves up…until the façade inevitably falls apart. Confidence is strength. You back your claims with integrity, truth, and performance.
But there is a time when cockiness serves its purpose through confidence. The confident person can be cocky, which translates into charisma that people are drawn to.
Inc
